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I'm getting pretty disturbed

i'm getting pretty disturbed at the fact that i'm getting tired at about 10:00 at night. and real life hasn't really settled in quite yet.

i don't really have all that much to share, as i haven't done much of anything today. i did do my radio show, which was nice, but other than that i've watched television, debated whether or not to do something productive (not as of yet, just so you know), mapped out a little bit of a long-overdue story...in other words, appreciating a day off.

but i feel as though there's something really interesting i should be doing, like i sent an rsvp to a party with the nicest people and the finest beverages and the best music, and i completely forgot about it. like i neglected to write a reminder of the affair on my (john deere tractor) calendar, and i ended up sitting here instead.

and i really should go to bed, as the quik chop is looking very tempting. but first, some notes:

i really would like to suddenly have a collection of the finest motown songs ever. now i'm not talking about a sold-on-tv, biggest-hits-of-motown collection. i'm talking about the finest motown songs ever.

cd count for the year is up to thirteen: damien jurado and gathered in song, i break chairs was given to me by kwur's music directorship because they know i dig damien jurado profusely. the liner notes form a chair...it's pretty cool. now i know that the cd was not actually purchased, but it was not in my collection prior to today, and now it is, so it counts.

i don't think i mentioned this before, but before my parents left town, they cut me a check to help defray costs of my attendance at michigan fest. my parents rock, and now i might--repeat might--be able to go. cross your fingers.

preliminary review of the damien jurado and gathered in song cd: first, damien's voice is much fuller when fronting a noisy rock band than when accompanying himself on an acoustic guitar. second, this band is loud. and good.

i originally typed "secondly" above. mr. schenck (high school english teacher, and yes, it was pronounced "skank") would have felt a small pain in his heart had i let that stand. god bless you, mr. schenck.

tomorrow night, assuming i get off work early, will find me standing in a bar listening to mates of state. the concert situation for me in the next few weeks is looking pretty damn good, culminating in death and dismemberment on 8 march. rock on, indeed.

i'm finding myself forgetting to eat meals quite often nowadays. too many other, more important things to do? or absent-mindedness? you make the call.

you know, i'm getting really tired of trying to find a good, all-inclusive website about a (usually) fairly obscure band, only to find none that are really well done. if i was more industrious, i'd start some of my own. but i'm not.

finally, every couple of months or so, i lasso up all my cds running around loose in the apartment and put them back in their rightful, alphabetical (boring, i know) places. within a couple of weeks, though, they're scattered again. 22 cds on my desk right now. i once found a cd in my clothes hamper. which isn't too weird, but i found it while at the laundromat. just so you know.

I have been tired

You know, i have been tired since about 8:30 or so, but i decided--for reasons still unknown to me--to get online and mess around for a while. yes, i kept myself updated on urban legends. yes, i downloaded a few mp3s (mostly mountain goats and songs: ohia stuff, but there were other random ones as well). and yes, i wasted a lot of time.

one of the things that took up a bunch of time was trying to figure out just what the deal is with the mountain goats. as i said before, there's supposed to be a new album coming out on tuesday, on emperor jones records. then, while browsing the (mostly non-helpful) websites devoted to mr. john darnielle, i saw something about the mountain goats recording an album for 4ad. no word on 4ad's website, and emperor jones doesn't even have a website (that i know of)--although i did discover (indirectly) that my dad is dead recorded an ep for john flansburgh's hello cd club. which i found odd. and i also discovered that tiny telephone is john vanderslice's website. i think.

if the above paragraph confused you, welcome to my world right now. i think what i need to do is go to bed. that sounds good.

a girl i work with was kind enough to tape some curling matches for me. she just needs to get me the tape now.

i still can't explain the curling thing.

i am going to alaska, where the animals can kill you.

but they do so in silence, as though if no one hears them,

then it really won't matter.

Of course i forgot

and of course i forgot something. thanks to sarah for reminding me, and oh yeah...for the link, too.

"thanks" to some of my co-workers, i consumed more sugar today than i had in the last three weeks--combined. "let's celebrate valentine's day by bringing in rice krispie treats, brownies, and truffles that have just enough of a mocha flavor to them to make them absolutely irresistable," they must have said. damn it.

i never actually mentioned this, but i cut sugar out of my diet (except for the sugar in peanut butter, natch) several weeks ago, partially for health reasons, and partially because i was getting really bad toothaches (t-minus forty-two days until i'm eligible for dental insurance at work, and then i'll find out just how many cavities i have).

my plan was working perfectly until they (wait--say "they" as venemously as possible. that's it. that's how that should be pronounced) had to tempt me so.

and yes, i now have a toothache. dammit.

I do this thing whenever

i do this thing whenever i drink soda. for some reason, the first drink i take of said soda commences as such: tilt glass/can/bottle. allow beverage to come in contact with taste buds, setting off a chain reaction in by brain that results in me thinking "mmm...soda." swallow. [...wait for it...] hiccup. every single time. it freaks me out. am i doing something wrong on www.chaturbaterooms.com?

so yes, my parents are indeed in town. and thankfully, i'm much less stressed out about the entire proceedings. and i'm meeting them for breakfast in, oh, about nine hours, which is why i'm writing this a little earlier than usual. but my parents are doing well. my dad explained capital gains/losses to me. we talked about st. louis's urban sprawl (akin to detroit's "white flight"). talked about weddings (my older brother's getting married, as mentioned earlier. apparently i'm a groomsman, but apparently joe forgot to, well, ask me). [there were many more wedding-related things, but they were boring and/or useless to write here, so i clipped them] basically we talked about stuff other than my finances, and when i'd get back to school full time. and talking about anything other than those two things with my parents is always nice.

small aside to amy, because it just hit me--that thing you wrote about growing up and dealing with parents' protectiveness and everything? well, i've got a few years on you, and i'm still dealing with it. ain't life grand?

i had planned to write a whole long thing about my slightly strained (thanks to me, of course) relationship with my parents at this point. but it all boils down to the fact that i love them dearly, and want more than anything to make them proud of me. quite honestly, that is what keeps me moving, what keeps me (at least somewhat) motivated to make something of myself. but until i've made something of myself, become something i'm truly proud of, there will be stress, and awkwardness, and maybe even a few "what the hell is he thinking"s. there...probably 1000 words boiled down to the essential live sex show pieces.

while the get up kids are falling out of favor in my musical life, i will now listen to "fall semester" (from the pre-"we're rock stars" album, four minute mile) and think.

tomorrow i will be less, well, brooding. i hope.

happy day after valentine's day. or for some, picking up the pieces day.

i'll try to compromise for you to see that there's so many other things for me to find out.

happy valentine's day

Happy anti-valentine's day to those who do not. i myself am a love agnostic, and as a result think of it as just being the day after my older brother's birthday.

oh crap...i forgot to e-mail my older brother and wish him a happy birthday. dammit. well, happy belated birthday, joe. and, come to think of it, happy belated birthday to susan (my sister) as well--hers was the ninth. crap. i'm a bad brother.

so i'm spending today working, and then going to dinner with my parents. happy valentine's day, indeed.

mp3 central around my apartment today. well, not really, but it felt like it. chris put up an mp3 for "gerry cheevers," one of the finest songs ever melding love and hockey--and, for the record, the cheeky monkey (aka michael shelley and one of the guys from teenage fanclub) version of the song is splendid as well. i also downloaded a new-ish song--"microfilmed"--from her space holiday. slatch had a link to new mountain goats songs, along with a reminder that the new mountain goats album is out next week. i'm happy about that.

but i must also curse slatch, for throwing only a tad over a minute and a half of that old modest mouse track onto the site. i'm left thirsting for more.

oh, and the cd count (as in purchased) for the year is up to twelve. i bought the soundtrack to crime and punishment in suburbia for five bucks. well worth it.

at the laundromat this evening, i could have sworn that i saw a woman pour a cup of urine into her washer. that's what it looked like, at least.

and on that note, goodnight sweet prince (or princess).

Long day

now let's go to the list:

everyone's talking about the oscar nominations. of course, having only seen amelie in the theater in the last six months, i don't feel like i should even look at the list--while the oscars contain about as much appeal to me as a congressional circle jerk, i don't need any more reminders of how many jasminelive movies i missed in the last year. but hell, i'll just say, sight unseen, that the royal tenenbaums deserved more recognition.

yes, in case you're wondering, i'm still pissed that one of my classes was cancelled.

so my parent's visit has been finalized, even though i'm working every day they're here. as a result, i get to see the miles davis exhibit at the missouri history musem (which is good) at probably 8:00 in the morning on friday (which is not good). i'm going to try to convince my dad to go to the sesame street exhibit as well...that should be interesting.

as sick as it is, one of the reasons (albeit far from the main reason) i want to go see the miles davis thing is to see the god-awful clothing he wore in the late 70s/early 80s.

i finally finished word freak earlier today. short short review: a piece of nonfiction that has characters only a fiction writer could dream up. it's a remarkable book, really. intriguing, insightful, and oddly funny--liz, amber, everyone...read this. i approve.

i've moved on to this. maybe i'll stop eating fast food as a result.

as apprehensive as i am about the actual quality (and ability to suspend disbelief) of panic room, the trailer has intrigued me. having david fincher (se7en, the game, fight club) at the reins certainly helps, though.

thanks to a website whose address i misplaced in the half hour since i looked at the site, i discovered some intriguing music news:

superchunk is one step closer to being pearl jam (in a weird way). they are releasing official bootlegs of some shows from the last tour some time soon.

azure ray's new album (called burn and shiver) is set for release on 9 april. yay.

crooked fingers has signed to merge records, finally explaining why the name was on the merge website for a while.

the magnetic fields have signed to classical-heavy nonesuch records, meaning they're now on the same label as wilco, emmylou harris, youssou n'dour, and...henryk gorecki?!?!? interesting...

gorecki's symphony no. 3 really is striking (that's not from the website...that's all me)

i really have to remember to do laundry tomorrow.

i think my hearing is finally back to normal. why was it not normal, you ask? well, let me end the list and i'll tell you...